Chuck Norris Facts, Apple style

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  • Chuck Norris handwriting was misread by the Newton. Once.
  • Chuck Norris doesnt browse iTunes. He just stares at his Mac until it plays the song he wants.
  • Roz Ho was once as captivating and charismatic as Steve Jobs -until Chuck Norris round house kicked her to the face.
  • Chuck Norris is the only person Steve Jobs fears getting into an elevator with.
  • Apple renamed the PowerBook because Chuck Norris demanded it.
  • There is only one way to break into Mac OS X: Chuck Norris fist.
  • To avoid a repeat lawsuit, Apple is paying Chuck Norris to breath on all new iPods. They dont scratch. Ever.
  • In fear of upsetting Chuck Norris, Apple insured all the applications on his new iMac were Universal Binaries, including Photoshop.
  • Apples original 1984 Super Bowl commercial featured Chuck Norris. It was deemed far too awesome to display on television and was replaced by an alternate commercial only half as good.
  • Chuck Norris is the reason Woz left Apple.


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8 responses to “Chuck Norris Facts, Apple style”   RSS

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  1. 1El Piranna
    Cool. Really, really cool 😀
  2. 2Gary
    This is just way to funny manif you want the original chuck norris facts, go here

  3. 3fetcho
  4. 4chornbe
    Windows Vista will boot on the new Macs because Chuck Norris said so.Chuck Norris took the bite out of the Apple logo.
  5. 5xSmurf
    Ive read somewhere (my sources demanded to stay anonymous) that Chuck Norris said this was all true except for the last one.Woz actually left because Norris doesnt like hippies and didnt want to be his friend. This is also why Chuck recently deemed the Segway uncool.
  6. 6David
    Hilarious!!! 😀
  7. 7Vic
    The original website for the facts was actually created by a student at Brown named Ian Spector, and can be found here: looks like it was built solely to make money off this phenomenons popularity.

  8. 8Software serial numbers
    Is it really the truth?